I would like to take this opportunity to appreciate Linda and Jennifer for the wonderful experience I had with this programme. Their teaching was experiential and inspiring. It led to a transformational shift in both my personal and professional self.
I would also like to appreciate my trio group, Sonia and Raynette, for the supportive and empathetic space they provided throughout the journey. Last but not least, I would like to appreciate Anastacia, Pong and my fellow classmates for creating a warm learning environment whereby different perspectives were generously and compassionately exchanged.
The Foundation B programme created an impact for me in the following areas:
The twelve questions skilfully guided me to enter the space in “Exploring the Impact of the Family Rules”. Initially, I felt a sense of uncertainty as I recalled and re-experienced the circumstances and the situation of how my family rules evolved. However, under the encouragement and support from my trio group, I felt calmer and braver to go back into the relationship between my father and my “inner child”.
Instead of my usual blaming stance with my father, I began to understand the underlying intention of his actions to do his best to bring up his son. This realisation softened the boundary of my family rules. It allowed me subsequently to reach out to my father in order to seek reconciliation and walk alongside him.
Trusting the Process
All this while, I relied on the structure and a list of questions to guide my therapeutic work. Foundation B programme helped me to facilitate for my client/star to be able to see, hear, heighten their awareness of their perception/expectation, make meaning and be aware of their yearnings.
In this process of exploring the client’s “iceberg”, my experience in trusting the process was initially met with uncertainty and it would usually feel like “going around in circles”. Gradually, I understood the:
-the value of respecting their stories, pace and autonomy.
-the possibility that they would be able to manoeuvre their own changes and seek their own resources.
I learnt to trust the process and myself in connecting with my client/star in their emotional space. I then focused on becoming more sensitive; exploring positively directional questions in order to gently shift my client/star away from their storytelling and make small steps towards change.
The 5 Languages of Love
From the “5 Languages of Love”, I realised I am doing many “acts of service” out of an obligation and not out of love. I wondered why my “acts of service” were not previously appreciated by my wife. I started to
understand how different our love language is. After revisiting my own “iceberg”, I took steps to shift some of my expectations and perspectives. I started to set goals to fill up my own “emotional love tank” to be on the path to speak more “words of affirmation” and spend more “quality time” with my wife.
In conclusion, attending the Foundation Part B programme has been one of the best decisions that I have ever made.
Once again, I would like to thank Linda, Jennifer, Anastacia, Pong, Sonia, Raynette and my fellow classmates. I am feeling excited and eager to explore what Level 2 would bring about.
Thank you very much!
Beng Wee, Ng